When trolling dating sites is an art form




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But the name "troll" is far from one-size-fits-all. In fact, there are lots of trollish internet types skulking around online, looking for the next thing to troll about. Ken M and the lost art of 'do no harm' trolling. This troll's objective is to say that the thing you're talking about is not worth talking about. This could be any subject at any time: No matter what, the troll will ask, "Why is this news? Such is the nature of the troll. Perhaps the most famous example of do-no-harm trolling is Ken M, the hilariously uninformed commenter who still has a shockingly active fanbase on Reddit.

The do-no-harm troll's comments are confusing, but not harmful; weird, but not dangerous. They're based on a persona: As trolls go, they are pretty good. We all know a high-brow troll or seven who have the potential to inspire eye rolls every time they open their mouths. They don't always feel the need for elaborate clapbacks, especially when there's spelling or grammar in need of correcting. The high-brow troll essentially exists to put people in their place while also humble bragging.

These trolls will stop at nothing to ruin a pleasant discussion, no matter the subject matter. Even the lightest of topics aren't safe from their incessant negative energy.

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She declares herself a performance artist, compares herself to Andy Kaufman, and describes her trolling as "more cerebral than abrasive". According to this young troll, she's out for scalps, not souls. Young, employed and articulate, in many ways Cochran debunks popular stereotypes about trolls. She is no teenage boy, fuelled by foul energy drinks and hormones pushing bile into the cyberspace from the darkness of his bedroom. But she is gleeful when her trolling incites rage.

She feels good when being bad. I started getting text messages about how mad everyone was getting. I even had a guy who I went on one date with texting me saying he works with a member of one of the bands I was bashing and that he was pissed. Some people need to learn how to take criticism, especially on the internet. But who's laughing really? The many who believe trolling is a threat to civilisation are not. Those who trolls have chewed up and spat out aren't either.

Charlotte Dawson wasn't laughing when she landed in hospital. The father, grieving for his dead year-old girl, was not laughing when he confronted Cochran and other trolls face-to-face last week with the story of how his daughter's online tribute page was defaced by an anonymous troll-gang. Steven Deguara said there was nothing funny about trolling as he addressed Cochran during a live recording for an Insight trolls special. Though not responsible for his child's posthumous humiliation, Cochran was one of three self-proclaimed trolls who watched Deguara fight back tears while sharing his story.

Something has to be done. It takes a lot of strength to say 'no' to something that seems to offer all you've ever wanted in life but that has red flags. ChitragadaSharan - Thanks for reading, and for your comments! Yes, vigilant is a good word for it. Almost every week, we read about online scams of some sort, and our hearts are not immune to those scams.

Internet trolls are also real-life trolls | Jordan Gaines Lewis

It is an eye opener for people interested in Online dating. While there are countless advantages of the Internet, it requires us to remain a little cautious and vigilant as well. A hot social issue in common life, and you make it as a great hub in details. I believe that not few people can benefit from these knowledgeable information. I am totally against online dating, by the way. I used to have such chances and almost made it upon those impractical ideas from some romantic movies, but I blew them off at the last minute I pulled myself back to reality.

Look beyond the photo before you take the bait. This is so true. Looks can be deceiving. You couldn't have said it better. Great article and thorough warnings, etc but there are oh, so many date sites online now! I'm not sure some of our technology is even good for us anymore. Building cyber dating relationships over face to face interaction - I know it's just the way things are going, so I'm glad this article has been written to point out the numerous dangers of online dating scams.

CyclingFitness - I had not heard of sites paying people to submit profiles I am not surprised, though. I do think there are sites that look for 'marketable' people for various demographics, such as good-looking guys to attract women, or vice versa. Just another reason to avoid these sites, I think. Randy Godwin - Thanks so much for reading and commenting! You can call me Mary anytime you want to. Snakes count with me, and you're one of my favorites! I love your writing.

John Sarkis - Hi, John - I appreciate your votes and the share! Thanks for dropping by and reading! Cherry - You are indeed fortunate to have met someone worthy. I've seen the sick kid tricks, the 'widowed' guys who claim to have one son always eight-years-old, I noticed , and I know of men who were scammed by women with sickly grandparents.

They're absolute masters at it, and they know how to build the scam slowly rather than jumping in and making it obvious. Thanks for your comments here. Well I was into online dating 10 years ago and these are all the same red flags that were going on at that time. Wanting to instant chat with you especially on yahoo, having dead parents, or a deceased child. Seems nothing now had changed either.

So glad I met my husband. A very thorough article which deserves to be HOTD! I'm very pleased this hub has been chosen as such. One of the biggest cons I've found of online dating involves sites like Match. Thanks so much for your comments, Paradigmsearch, and for sharing the hub! I am honored it was selected for HOTD; there are so many great hubs on this site!

Bobbi - I need to read your hub - it sounds like it covers some information mine doesn't address. I like the idea of background checks. I am not sure how a site could verify the right person was being researched maybe they should get the NSA involved? I joined a few church sites, and there was no way to guarantee people were actually members of the church, so there were some really bad apples on it. This is very informative for the ones who do date online. I have done hours of research about online dating sites as I did a hub on it. And, I also warned to never join a site that did not do background checks on the members and verify their information.

And, I would even desire Drug Screening for the local sites. However, you have gone even further about the scams and the creeping evil fungi bottom-feeders who prey on trusting women and men. This is great and I hope the ones who are looking online read this and keep this information to judge their online use and can learn to read between the lines.

Thanks for reading the hub, and for your kind words! I'm sort of in the 'banned the sites for life' mode right now, but I have indeed met good friends of both genders on the sites I've visited. Mixed feelings, I guess? Suzettenaples - As many others have said, there are some success stories on those sites. I think it's like driving a car; you have to know the road you're on, and recognize the dark alleys if you see one. Hope this information is helpful, if you do try the sites! Purpose Embraced - Thanks so much for your comments, and for passing along the information!

Those who are in the dating mode do need to know what to avoid. I don't know how they find us there. I do know that some people have fallen for people on the dating sites, and also on Facebook. How I wish there were a way to ban them from the entire Internet. Thanks for your comments! Congrats on the Hub of the Day!

And this article will save a lot of people a lot of problems. In fact, I've even shared it. I recognize those messages you talked about at the beginning of your Hub. I'm not on a dating site, but sometimes I get random messages like that on Facebook, in my "other messages" section. This is a great hub. It is well written with a lot of relevant information. I am not in the dating game, but will surely pass it on to others who will find it useful.

Thanks for sharing an excellent hub. I enjoyed reading this and you give some excellent advice and tips for the lovelorn. I have been hesitant to use any of these dating web-sites. I know there have been some successes, but to weed out all the jerks takes so much time and effort. You have covered it all in the scam department. Excellent advice and tips Marcy! I have a few friends who used online dating. Some are happily married, some have banned the sites from their lives. I hope I never need to use them. Congrats on the HOTD! Hi, Patrick - I'm not sure if you mean you're shocked at her knowing your name, or that there was a response that met your request.

If the picture includes a woman, and if she's part of a scamming operation, what probably happened was that whomever rubs the scam has women he can use for photo ops. If you had not revealed your name, that would indeed be creepy. It's possible she or they could have gotten your name from a social site or picked it together somehow from other information. If you're on IM, I have heard but not verified that people can hack into your computer that way.

Online Dating Is a Woman’s Worst Nightmare

I'm not sure that's the case we would hear people screaming about it , but since hackers can even install webcam software and operate it remotely, just about anything can happen. If you feel these are scammers, get as much of their information as possible and report them to every possible agency. I have a situation she is a beautiful woman from Ghana.

I am sure she is scammer but was shocked today I asked to write my name on a large piece of paper and send me a picture and she did it. Well, it sure walks like a duck and quacks like a duck. I think you dodged a bullet, Roniti - glad you spotted his true colors. Thanks, Oldiesmusic - the con artists who do it regularly are pros at it. They learn new techniques each time they con someone, so their energy is spent in perfecting their lies. I'm glad you found useful information here, and I hope you never meet one of these creeps in person.

I almost fell into the trap of honey by email Thanks for answering my calls.. I missed you so much..

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Roniti, why I called you I was having some little issue, Because my Business visa, has expired, that was the reason why I called you.. Roniti, I need some few token of your helped.. Kindly give me your urgent response.. After I read this hub and the stories of the commentors And some of them cite that they work and travel in Africa. Now I know their style. Thanks for your warnings.

I sometimes chat with a lot of guys, flirt with them, but there's nothing serious so far. Now I have to be cautious. Thanks for those insights, Alexander!


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I like your move of letting them know you're onto the Ghana thing. I have also seen people who claim to not drink or smoke, and their pictures show otherwise.

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I guess the scammers don't filter their material very well? One more funny thing. I noticed some irregularities such as they say "I never drink alcohol" and in a profile pic they have a glass of wine. Too funny, sometimes if I'm bored I'll thoroughly waste their time, and lead them on. I have become quite adept at knowing who they are. I have actually put in my profile info "If you are from Ghana, I am not your fool! Do not waste my time, nor yours. Oh, gosh - yes, that has all the earmarks of the scammers.

They are always temporarily working in another country, and usually it's Africa. The reason they reveal that right away is so it won't come as a surprise when there's an 'emergency' and they need money. Or when their fake son, mother, grandparent whatever needs an operation. Or when they claim they need money for a ticket to come and see you. His claim of only recently moving to your area is so there won't be a way to check him out locally.

These people are beyond dishonest - really awful. If there's some way to get his IP info or whatever, you could perhaps report him to federal agencies. Be sure to report him to the dating site and get him banned. And do not IM with anyone like that. I've heard they can hack into computers from that, but I'm not sure. As for the flowery poems, I'm sure he's sent those to many women.

I think I am being scammed from someone who I met on a local dating site. Said he lived about 30 minutes away. He also wants to chat on yahoo messenger. He hasn't asked for money yet. I almost want to toy with him but it wouldn't be fair to him. So does't really answer questions I ask him about that area. Thought I would share. Hi, Marion - I sure relate to what your mom is experiencing.

There are some organized scam operations on most dating sites, and they're getting better every year at sounding normal and honest. I'll send up some prayers for your mother to spot the bad apples and to find the jewels who are out there. I love how you approached this from both sides to equip and protect as many people as possible. My Mom just entered the dating field after being divorced from her 25 year marriage and she's been complaining a lot about scams she's running into. From what she hears from friends, who were scammed with rebound marriages, she's also going to insist on a prenup if she marries again.

Scary online dating world out there. Hope I can keep my marriage together so I don't find myself in it. Tattuwrun - you came so close to getting scammed! Thank you, so much, for posting this first-person account of how these guys operate. This is exactly the type of con artist this article discusses, and having a 'real life' example is so helpful.

I'm so, so glad you recognized what was going on before it hurt you - either financially or emotionally. I remember having "dated" someone I never even met yet -- and gladly I didn't. While managing my account at a social media site, I received a private message from a guy and introduced himself. I looked at his profile pic -- the guy looked ruggedly handsome, at least on that photo.

And after that he would send me more PM's, and his words were becoming more romantic, flowery and passionate. He said he would satisfy my needs sexually, emotionally and financially -- and that he's living a comfortable life, does travelling as a hobby. He even recounted his past "tragedies" such as how his parents died in an accident that left him as an orphan, you know, those kind of sob stories. He would call me up almost every morning. I wasn't quite falling for him yet but I found him charming. He said he would be ready to fly very soon to my country and visit me.

He even said he was going to marry me, and buy a ring for me. I just went with the flow, though I was starting to like him very much I just had to see how it would go. Until one time he PM'd me. He said he was in "Africa" for a "stopover", but he added that he was detained because he lacked certain documents in order for to get himself bailed. And you know what? He said the authorities also needed money, and he said he didn't have anymore to pay them.

So he was asking me for money, I said I didn't have much of that to save him. He insisted that I ask my friends and officemates for money -- even a check or a voucher, etc. He was more persistent in sending me mails about the "bail money". All the romantic talk faded.

At first I was genuinely worried about his so-called suffering. Hey, wait a minute I realized that this guy was about to con me. So I replied to his offline messages and started taunting at him for days. He didn't reply to my messages and never bothered me again. I'm also glad you publish this hub, so that people will never be victims of this scam.

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Voted up and useful. Hi, AmandaJon - it's great to hear a success story! Naturally, many of us know of happy couples who met online and later married. It's the con artists who make things difficult for people, though, which is what is being addressed here. Thanks for dropping by and commenting!

Great hub, very useful tips! This is so sad that people manipulate other people's emotions to get money from them, this is outrageous! But I have met my husband online 5 years ago, we still together and very happy. So for joining a dating site was one othe the best decisions in my life. Don't let those con artist stop you from finding a date online, be careful and keep looking, Good luck!

Wow - thanks for sharing this real-life experience - and good job in spotting the signs before you got defrauded. How I wish these people would be caught and prosecuted. I have just become a victim of this, however, i realise that things weren't right when he claimed his 6 year old son had been hit by a motorcycle and was in hospital with injuries he couldn't pay for. I strung him along for the rest of the time. Even told him i was on the next flight with money to help.


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Eventually, i fronted him about it and first he denied it, then admitted it. I was actually trying to get details from him about who the guy he was posing as, who the pictures were of, have tried various sites to reverse search the pics myself and cannot find him, only one site in oregon might have one pic.

Lessons learnt, this site is very accurate. He was a man with a business working abroad, with a 6 year old son, claiming to live in London, when he was running everything from Nigeria. Hi, Dancingpopes - thanks for your very informative comment here. I think many women and some men would like a place where they could 'blacklist' the bad apples. It's very true that being scammed out of your emotions is a painful experience - and it takes a long time to recover. If we could figure out what makes some people approach relationships with dishonestly, we would get rich!

I wish a site could be created listing the names of men and women from these sites like POF and MATCH who claim they want a relationship and tell you how great you are, etc, but JUST want sex, or tell you how great you are, meet you, and pretend to like you because they think you have money, only to find out you don't and suddenly they're gone. That would border on slander, I'm sure, and some people would list names out of spite, but wouldn't it be great in a perfect world if there could be a list of these people to check.

I've never been scammed out of money, I've been scammed of my feelings. Why must they go through the bulls of telling you how wonderful you are, what great chemistry you have, and what a great team you'd make? I'm so sorry you went through that, Jan - I know of others who have been conned, and it hurts on so many levels. How I wish there were easier ways to spot these jerks.

Good information, I wish I had read this before I gave my money to a con artist. He had my heart now I'm hurt and not trusting. He talked to me for hours months m Im and phone lie after lie protect yourself.

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